Waiting, Not Camping

The Four - walking the streets of Sheffield

So, here we are - day 12 of our travels, one week post-cardiology appointment and no answers.  We have no answers because there have been no tests.  It is hard to not compare the process here with how I know think it would be in the US.  Andy has 2 more tests before his follow up with the doctor, and those are next week.  This has been a long process of waiting and wishing we had things done more quickly, and wondering if going to the US wouldn't have been a better idea... here we have driving on the left, renting a car, finding/borrowing carseats for all kids, figuring out where to buy groceries, wishing we had more or different seasonally appropriate clothes, or the struggle to cook and store food.  Is it really worth it?  Was this the best decision?  Why is there so much waiting time?  We want to go back to life.  Nora is begging to go back to Togo, Silas is wanting a normal routine, Maeva is more clingy.  The waiting is hard.  I feel like we're wasting our time.  Andy's symptoms have seemed less severe and less noticeable (to me) in the last couple of days.  I'm worried that when they finally start the tests it won't show the problem.
There are benefits to being here: there are actual grocery stores, fresh fruit and vegetables are everywhere, you can see lots of history around, you don't sweat continually, the power and water have stayed on the whole time we've been here, and it's been fun to watch the kids be excited about clean water, elevators, and all that stuff we don't have in Togo.  We've been able to spend time with my mom for the first time in a very long time.  It's been good, but even with all of that we all just want to be back in Togo.  That's so weird to say, but it's true.
So, here we are.  Wondering and waiting.  Sometimes feeling like we're wasting our time.  Wishing we would have had more and more accurate information before making all our decisions... not wanting to spend or waste all our money.

The Four at a nearby park

Since we are in the UK with this extra time, I started researching things, people, and places that might be close that we could visit.  I looked up C.S. Lewis to see if there were any buildings, museums, etc. in regards to his work.  There really aren't, but I read this quote from him:

I do not know why there is this difference, but I am sure God keeps no one waiting unless He sees that it is good for him to wait.  When you do get into the room you will find that the long wait has done some kind of good which you would not have had otherwise.  But you must regard it as waiting, not as camping.  You must keep on praying for light: and, of course, even in the hall, you must begin trying to obey the rules which are common to the whole house.  And above all you must be asking which door is the true one; not which pleases you best by its paint and paneling.

L & me, trying to keep warm

Such good reminders for me.  There is worth in the waiting, and God won't keep us here without it doing us some sort of good.  Maybe it's just to step away from Togo and be together, maybe it's for something much greater, and maybe I will never know.  But, I take comfort in remembering this is just a place of waiting, not camping.  We won't be in this place forever.

Thanks for all the thoughts and prayers.  We are so blessed to have so many who love us all.

Amanda

Unexpected Adventure

Putting the roof on this week at Hope Radio

Here we are again.  Since Andy's return to Togo he's had intermittent problems with his heart.  That's right, his heart.  The doctors here have been great to collaborate with each other, friends in the States, and do whatever we can to diagnose and even treat the issues.  He's been on a medication for a few months, but even with that his symptoms continue to increase in severity, duration, and frequency.  It's a little unnerving, actually.  The heart is kind of vital.  And, honestly, this isn't what we want right now.  We felt that we were finally getting into a role, a routine of work, school, and ministry.  The radio is so close to broadcasting - we are working on programming schedules and finishing the last of construction.  

Andy at HoH as they monitored him through the night last week

This feels like a set back.  People say one step forward and two steps back, but it often feels that we are missing out on the forward part...  we do backwards well.

So, through all of the international insurance stuff, locating records, talking with providers across the world, and what feels like a multitude of other details, we have a plan.

A week from today we leave for Lomé and then board our flight the following evening with our final destination being Sheffield, England.  Andy's appointment is scheduled for March 8th, and right now my prayer is that there will be clear answers.  The kids keep asking about fruit, wondering if there are strawberries and blueberries and grapes there :)  Lena asked if we are coming back to Togo, "because I really love living here."  Such sweet reminders to know that the kids are well and have adjusted and even like living in Togo.  

We are readying our house to be vacant for an unknown period of time, thinking about how we are going to freeze, and clinging to the verses that remind us that God goes before us.

So.  That's that.  In the mean time, I've gone out with friends to get half of my hair braided, and we've been on the search for winter clothes.  We are going full force into this unexpected adventure!

The verse that has guided me through many moments continues to come to mind again:

Deuteronomy 31:8

The Lord is the One who will go before you.  He will be with you; He will not leave you or forsake you.  Do not be afraid or discouraged.

We have had some people ask about the financial cost involved in all of this and if there is a way they can help.  Here are a couple of options.

Giving throught Landmark - Anderson, IN:

• Give directly to the church, designating for Justison Medical
• Mail: 1924 W Cross St Anderson, IN 46011
• Call: (765) 649-3805 for questions or more information

Giving through ABWE (online):

• Click here, choose the amount you want to give, make a note that it is for medical expenses
• Call 800-901-2293 (ABWE Donor services) for questions you may have